The Demigod Handbook
by little miss jolie
Summary: "Once upon a time, there lived two girls who were forced to write everything down that might help young demigods survive..." Pssh, no. If you survive or not depends on how tough you really are. We're just telling our story, and hoping you might learn from it. (T for swearing and for the narrators' sass)
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Because why not?**

XXX

What would you prefer? A gaggle of tittering socialites or an evil _empousa _who wants to take over your position in the social hierarchy_? _

I'd say I'd prefer the she-demon. You'd probably think I'm insane, but at least I can slash and burn that demon to a crisp, rip out her horns and fangs and take her legs as a trophy. And then tear out her hair and slash out her eyes. And then maybe run her through again with my bare hands.

You think I have issues? Yeah, I do. But since you're reading this, chances are you do, too.

Chiron tells me I don't have much time. Since Percy and the Seven are away, it's up to me and Niki to write down the stories for younger demigods.

Oh, sorry. You must be confused. Well, read on and you'll see.

I'll let Niki take over, for now.

Still confused? Get used to it.

Welcome to the world of demigods; filled with adventure, death, and destruction.

XXX

Let's dispense with the formalities. My name's Niki, nothing flashy or important to define me.

Unlike most tales of heroes, this isn't a particularly strange one. I can tell you for a fact. Everything started to change on one particularly normal day.

The first thing I can remember is the heat. A shirt sticking, forehead slicking warmth that made me feel absolutely disgusting. However, I couldn't escape the heat even I if I wanted to. Rather, I was putting myself in the California inferno for one reason - horse riding.

I was lucky. The riders who were practicing looked absolutely miserable, their red polo shirts clinging to their lanky figures. Their beige and black breeches were smudged with dust; all of their eyes squinted against the blasting heat and dust. Trickles of sweat poured down the sides of their faces underneath their black, very uncomfortable looking helmets. Not to mention the leather knee-high boots that they wore. It was practical for riding but in the heat seemed stuffy.

The silver spurs shone on their heels, their steeds' coats sweat-streaked. Some of them were posting or sitting to an agonizingly slow trot, while others were cantering at a speed too fast for the muggy weather. A few brave people were jumping over oxers and verticals, faces scrunched up with concentration.

Glad that I had taken the practical route with a decent pair of ankle length boots, I leaned against the stable fence, watching the riders and paying special attention to one particularly small figure on a large, sorrel gelding, whom was the sole reason that I had come to the stables.

The gelding's name was Nemo. His dark brown eyes stared at me intelligently as I waved my hand, the rider approaching. I ran a bit forward to greet the large gelding, and the person before she would continue on her way.

As for the identity of the rider...

A large, black helmet covered her head, and her head was tilted towards the ground, squinting at the harsh rays of the sun. It was hard to see her face, but I could tell who it was, especially when I saw the slight, sharply angled shoulders.

It was Cory.

You might think it was ridiculous to believe that friendships can be established in a few days, but it became exactly that. A close connection just came into existence.

Cory had one thing going for her - she had a malicious streak that hid underneath her innocent facade.

Even though she was not conventionally beautiful, one would be a stuck pig if they didn't at least recognize that she was pretty. She had light, tan skin and large, almond shaped eyes that was attributed to her Asian heritage. Her eyes were slightly strange, a honey-maple syrup color that added a mischievous glint to her features. They glittered behind her round-rimmed, thick pair of glasses. She was built lean, albeit petite, and her fingers were wrapped carefully around the reins.

Nemo stopped briefly, and Cory looked down at me. Removing one hand from the reins, she waved back in return, eyes wide and excited. A strand of coffee-brown hair was stuck to her forehead, obviously from sweat.

I snorted at her excitement, and she rolled her eyes, urging Nemo to continue trotting on his own merry way.

Checking my watch, I noticed that there would be ten minutes before Cory's horse riding lesson would be over. Feeling nature call me, I decided to head to the bathroom before anything unnecessary would leak out.

Yeah, I literally described what I would be doing on the toilet. Get over it.

So, leaving my little purse in the shaded area next to the practice route, I headed towards the bathroom to do my duties.

Of course, since life always has to throw a wrench in my way, a rank odor met my nose, stopping me in my tracks.

I placed a hand over my sinuses, weirded out by the strange smell. It definitely wasn't the horses, or the bitter smell of gasoline from the cars passing by. It was like someone had decided to let something organic rot, spoiled meat specifically.

Either way, it was decidedly unpleasant, and I decided to investigate the source of the scent. Abandoning my previous quest, I started to follow the scent. My nose wrinkled as the strange smell turned potent, the smell ripening as I continued walking. My eyebrow cocked, and eyes squinted from the terrible odor that emanated from….the horse stables?

For a fact, horse stables don't really smell like rainbows and roses, but rather smells like what it is, horse dung and hay; a moist scent of horses and the soft earth underfoot.

It was a reckless move, but I ducked into the entrance. My eyes flicked around the small, airy space, searching for the source of the smell.

When I passed by a horse in its section, I noticed that his ears were laid back, as if listening intently for danger. His tail swished back and forth nervously, and greenish foam dripped from his mouth. The whites of his eyes were showing prominently as he pranced on the tips of his hooves, obviously perturbed.

"Weird…" My voice trailed off. Then I saw a small figure, a shadow at the far end of the building. I decided to find out who it was, and passed the scared horses until I reached the person.

"Hello?"

The figure turned around, and she looked like an average girl my age, with a neat red polo shirt and black breeches that seemed perfectly cleaned, as well as boots that looked new. She was almost too completely clean and neat. I felt my heart pulse faster when I noticed the devilish smile creeping across the girl's face, too wide and too excited.

Her voice was hungry, almost dripping with drool.

"_Found you."_

I had a split second before the girl launched herself towards me, hands outstretched for my throat.

**A/N's: 'ELLO, THERE! This is Chausie here. I'll be speaking in bolds. Not sure what Mia (Soldatino) will use.**

**Anyway!**

**Yes, this is a collab! Mia is like, my bestest best best best best best best best best best best best friend EVARR. And we both have an obsession with PJO. SO HERE IT IS, LOVIES!**

**Hope it's way better than your average, shitty OC fic. :)**

**-Fairy**

_I will be using italics so it'll be clear who is who. We poured our sweat and tears into this, so I really hope you enjoyed. And more chapters will be coming soon! As soon as school gets off our backs._

_-Mia_


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry for not being able to actually tell that last bit of our tale last time. I was called over to the stables; a mare was having issues foaling her colt. Anyway, I'm here now, and Niki's away. Apparently, some of her cabin mates were pranking people and messing around, and well… let's just say it got a little messy.

My full name is Corentine Hoang, but I go by Cory. Don't ever call me by my full first name or full name, unless you want a knife up your nose. And calling me anything more, or less, and you'll get an extra one up your other nostril. Still continue to dub me something else, and you'll find two- one up your butt, the other down your throat. You're welcome. So, just call me Cory like I said.

XXX

It was frickin' hot. I mean, Niki thought she had it bad! She wasn't the one riding a frickin' horse in thick black leggings with leather pads and thick, black leather boots. Or a suffocating polo shirt bearing my stable's insignia.

The speed Nemo, my gelding, trotted beneath me seemed way too hot for the muggy air. Honestly. My feet were so sweaty, they keep slipping in their socks, and my socks keep slipping in my boots, so I lost my stirrups nearly every minute. I felt like screaming, but couldn't for obvious reasons.

The ring was rather large, littered with random oxers and verticals; faux stone walls and other random obstacles for the horses to jump. Sadly, I haven't yet progressed to that level and I was still stuck on mastering the canter.

Joy.

There was a tiny island in the middle of the sandy ring, with a thin and willowy tree. Its thin boughs waved in the heat, and its tiny shadow seemed to be the only place of shade around.

The grass around the tree was withered and there was also an empty cooler, once filled to the brim with chilled water bottles.

Sticking close to the rail, I kept a wary eye out for any oncoming riders. I remembered what my instructor said. _Rise and fall with the leg on the wall. _Trivial at the moment, as seeing how I mastered the trot, but those words kept repeating in my mind.

Oh, yeah. Chances are, young demigod (can't stop saying it in that Yoda-voice) then you've probably got ADHD and dyslexia and a bunch of other random-ass shit disorders that make your teachers go bat-shit crazy but keeps you alive when the Minotaur tries to eat your face.

I cussed? Big whoops. Suck it up, ya pansy.

Anyway, as I narrowly dodged another rider, I noticed Niki leave her post at the railing and walked towards the stables and bathrooms. I guess she felt the 'call of the wild' (as she puts it so eloquently) but I couldn't help but feel worried…

Since the minute I had stepped into the stable property, I have had that little niggling feeling that something was off. I can't explain it, but it was like my internal radar was screaming 'get out of there!' and all my instincts told me to run. Course, me being the ever-so(not)logical person, I shrugged off my trepidation.

But I wasn't the only one sensing the distress. Even as I stepped into the crossties, I noticed the horses' laid-back ears, nervous behaviour and how their eyes rolled back. When I tried grooming Nemo, he nipped at me. And he never did that.

So, call me a superstitious weirdo, but I had a hunch that Niki was in danger. And I decided to follow it.

After walking Nemo out (which really didn't help with my trepidation, but seriously, giving my horse colic is not cool) I rode him out of the arena. Not bothering to dismount, I urged him down to the lower stables, biting my lower lip nervously.

I ducked under the rafters, the stables eerily quiet. No tails swishing or affectionate nicking.

But as I rounded the corner down the next aisle, well, let's just say, from that moment on my life would totally get wrecked.

I saw the back of Niki's head, but a shadow of a figure was what caught my eye. I stiffened briefly, feeling my body freeze in place. Something was wrong. The horses stared at me, their dark eyes bright and glinting with fear, hiding deep in their stall as if to get away from me as far as possible.

An guttural growl erupted from the dark figure, and I realized that it was pinning Niki to the floor.

Niki screamed, her voice strained with fear. "Help!" Her voice trembled, as she wildly slammed her hands and arms against the figure, trying to break free of the unyielding grasp.

The scream died, and I heard gurgling as Niki attempted to shout again. Fingers were wrapped around her throat, stopping her breath midway.

I could see a hint of a dark tongue peeking out of the figure's mouth, saliva dripping down its human-like appearance. Sharp teeth poked out of her mouth, and I knew at that exact moment that the monster was going to rip my friend's throat apart.

So, I did what anyone would do. Attack that bitch and take her down, rip out her entrails and stuff them down her pathetic throat-what?

[Oh, sorry- Niki says that's too graphic. We're supposed to keep it rated-G (too late anyway, now. HAH. SUCK IT.)]

Anyway, I flung myself at the figure, out of the saddle, catching it off guard as I pinned it to the ground with all of my strength. My momentum was off, and I slammed my left knee awkwardly against the floor. I ignored the throbbing ache, and used my body weight to ensure the monster would stay in place, roughly yanking off the claws from Niki's throat.

There was a grunt of surprise and I heard a relieved gasp of air. My hands shook with adrenaline, as I pushed myself up to a sitting position. My leg protested the movement as I gritted my teeth, staring at the mysterious figure that lay face-down on the dirt floor. I still kept my knee on its back to pin it down. It snarled at me, demonic eyes flashing in the dim lighting in the stables. Nemo neighed nervously, prancing up and down the aisle.

"Oh, great Mother Hecate," it snarled, small flames sparking in its hair. The flames made a wreath on her head, so she looked like a demonic angel. "You demigods aren't even _worth it._ Kelli is _so_ going to kill me if I don't bring back any prey."

Before I could even reply, Niki beat me to it. "What do you mean prey? Is this some joke because I'm part Asian? I _know _what demi means."

The thing rolled its eyes before a hoarse, gritty cackle erupted from its throat, and the flames on its head darkened, flickering wildly until it returned back to its normal bright flame. "And a boneheaded one at that, Gods help me….worse than the Minotaur.."

"HOLY FUCKING ASS SHIT!" I screamed, "DAMMIT YOU SHITHEAD! WE'RE IN A PLACE FILLED WITH FUCKING FLAMMABLE HAY! ARE YOU SERIOUS!? AND WHAT ABOUT THE HORSES?" Okay, so maybe I should be worrying about the more important things (i.e. my friend being attacked, weird-ass monster and all that good crap) but honestly, I think I can't worry about that while I'm being burned to death.

Niki grabbed my shoulder, as if to calm me down, but her short nails dug into my flesh. To be honest, my friend had a 'slight' aversion to anything that involved spirits and horror, and this situation was probably stressing her poor heart. Her dark eyes seemed close to pure knockout from stress and fear, clouded with almost acceptance of our imminent death. _Fantastic. I have to be the mature one this time around. _Breathing heavily from my random spiel, I took a glance at the monster.

The monster raised its nostrils. It was clearly disgusted at our state; we were covered in hay after all, and our bodies were covered in sticky sweat. Not to mention the fact that my cursing had probably not provided anything for her except the fact that I might have sounded a bit crazy.

"Ugh, this is _soooo _boring!" The thing stood up, dusting hay off of herself, and with a flick of a hand her clothes and hair were crisp and clean.

I gaped. "Are you serious?! Then what the hell is _your_ definition as a _**regular**_ damn day?!"

The monster totally ignored my comment. "You should watch your mouth, mortal. You're no better than all the regular demigod spawn, much less a mortal." Her voice turned dark, and she casually whipped out a mirror, freshly applying an obnoxious pink color to her lips. With an another wave of her hand, she stood up and brushed off the dirt on her fawn breeches. She model-strutted off, leaving the distinct reek of Abercrombie in her wake.

Niki choked, covering her nose with her sleeve. "Couldn't go without rubbing her presence in our faces, huh?" Her nose curled, as the bitter smell of ash filled the air.

My eye twitched. "What the fuck is a demigod? Bitch, and what the hell do you mean by _mortal?_" I called after her.

Maybe a normal person would've reacted differently. But as you've probably noticed, I am not in any ways normal. And to be honest, I've been through some really weird events in my life, anyway. Frankly, I was probably so weirded out anyway my circuits were overloaded and it wasn't as if I could feel any weirder.

I stop up, and glanced at Niki. Nemo had his orange rump facing me, taking a drink out of another horse's water bucket over their stall door. The Appaloosa mare who occupied the stall looked rather annoyed. Sighing, I strode over and grabbed his reins under the chin, gently yanking him away from the feed bucket. He whickered in protest, but followed my anyway.

I glanced at Niki. "My mom's going to be here any minute. I gotta go get Nemo untacked. Until we can figure out what happened today, don't tell _anyone._ Yeah?"

Niki glanced down at the way the girl had come, biting her lip. "Yeah."

I could tell she was still curious, so on the fly, I decided to make a hasty decision. "Hey. After we change, can you meet me Rossier Cove at three?"

She raised her eyebrows almost as if she could hear my thoughts, and nodded.


End file.
